Monday, March 4, 2013

Fallen Star

I wrote this poem a while back and requested some feedback. It received good responses along with critiques. One person even stated, “...this started out with one of THE most romantic lines I have ever read.” What do you think? 


Fallen Star

Have you ever
seen a fallen star
and wondered

who had caught it?

Was it Aphrodite,
holding it hostage
to give to her next lover,

Or Apollo

who grabbed hold
of it, to steal the
light for his lyre?

For I doubt
if you had caught
the star

you’d keep it a
secret from me,

because our lives
were sworn to truth
and love, and secrets

are hypocrisy.

Have you ever wondered?

Wishes and Stars,
Bea

10 comments:

  1. What a beautiful poem. The last stanza is particularly striking. Thanks for sharing this.

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    1. Thank you, A.K. I appreciate you taking the time to read it and comment.

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  2. I love this, Denise. The question: "Have you ever wondered?" is so provocative. It's the bones of poetry and the channel to letting our imaginations soar. Your words make me feel like a little girl at story-hour. :)

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    1. LOL! Thanks, Barb. I'm glad my words move you in a positive way.

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  3. I like the line "For I doubt if you had caught the star you’d keep it a secret from me." For me that is the most powerful line of the whole piece. It resonates a personal truth.

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    1. I appreciate your input, Jon. Yes, the end is on more of a personal level.

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  4. The line that resonates most with me is "secrets are hypocrisy." Your poetry posts really make me miss teaching poetry. I can feel some blog posts related to poetry coming on for National Poetry Month ;)

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    1. It's funny, when I took poetry in school, I didn't like it. We had to analyze and break everything down, learn iambic pentameter, etc. Then I started writing poetry, and enjoyed the emotion I could put into it. I should really do the National Poetry Month challenge, too.

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  5. It's well written as a whole, but the ending really sells it. I love this. Very well done.

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