Saturday, August 20, 2011

Don’t Call Me, I’ll Call You!

Over the past few years I’ve heard people say how aggravated they get when they text someone and the person calls them back. They’ve said that they text the person because they don’t want to talk to them. Recently I’ve seen a trend in unanswered calls, but responses in text, email or on Facebook. Maybe it’s me. Maybe the people in my life don’t want to talk to me. But if that’s true, then I have to ask, “Why bother contacting me at all?”

I’m writing this post because I don’t understand the whole “don’t call me when I text you” thing, so hopefully someone can explain it to me. Have phone calls already become a thing of the past? There have been a few times, maybe coincidences, when I’ve called someone and they didn’t answer the phone, but shortly afterward I’ve received a text or email from them. Really? When I’m trying to set something up, or even have a quick question, I want to talk to the person. First off, I don’t like text talk such as ‘u’ for ‘you’. I feel it’s making us a dumber and lazier society. Secondly, things get lost in translation when you text and email. For me, nothing is more annoying than going back and forth in several texts and emails to set up the simplest get together when I could get it done within a five minute phone call. Done—no more time wasted.

Technology has given us so many wonderful opportunities, yet it’s also made us strangers even to our closest friends and family. I don’t know if it’s laziness or impatience that makes people want to text or send email instead of hearing the person’s voice. Some people I know say texting and emailing is quicker. I shrug at that argument because I don’t agree. If someone sends me an email while I’m out, I won’t get it until I come home. I don’t have a multi-mobile fetish—my phone allows calls and texting. I’m not a “here, now, know my location and what I’m doing at this moment” kinda gal. I’ll admit that I don’t like talking on the phone for long periods of time, and when I’m not in the mood to talk that pretty much covers all mediums.

This whole “don’t call me, I’ll call you” thing makes me wonder about emergencies. What if someone called a friend or family member because they were in an emergency situation and that person decided not to answer but text? I posed this question to someone before and they told me the person should have called 9-1-1, not them.

Are you a “Don’t Call Me, I’ll Call You” person? Do you think there’s anything wrong with texting and emailing instead of calling? Are you a “here, now, know my location and what I’m doing at this moment” kind of person? Do you think talking on the phone should be a thing of the past?

Let me…but just don’t call.


  1. I like to hear a human voice. Texting takes longer and can get confusing. I do think we are becoming dumber as a result of texting and even Facebook. Language in literature is being dumbed down, as well. Probably in a few more decades conversation will be limited to a few grunts!

  2. Hi Belva, It's nice to know I'm not the only one who feels this way about phone calls. I just hope you're not right about the grunts. *sighs*

    Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

  3. I'm still using snail mail as a way to get in touch with people. :P Seriously, you know I'm with you on this. I don't have a multi-mobile fetish either. I enjoy talking on the phone with my friends & family, but that's reserved for my *home* phone. I'm not a big mobile-talker. Or texter. I don't even have the qwerty keyboard, though I am due for a new phone...

    Technology is amazing and has allowed us so many ways to improve communications (i.e., I love that my kids can skype with my out-of-state parents any old time; we often feel like they're right here), but whenever a useful and smart technological advancement and/or social media advancement pops onto the scene, therein lies the capacity to abuse it.

    Good to see you back here, Bea! :)


  4. Barb,

    You said it very eloquently about the amazement of technology. When I was living in Germany, I spoke to my mother every day on Skype. It isn't the same as being with them, but at least you can actually see that they're fine.

    Thanks. I'll be completely back within a few weeks. :D

  5. i'll call you if you want me to, dork.


  6. I understand the rationale and sometimes experience it, even though I don’t have a cell phone or blackberry. A phone call is in real time, involving split second communication decisions. I have to decide on the spot how I’m going to reply. Even pausing to decide what to say communicates one’s potential indecision, which I may not want the other person to know that I’m experiencing. This involves mental and, at times, emotional work, something I may not be interested in doing at that precise moment.

    With texting (or, in my case, emailing) I can reflect. I can reflect on each word, I can reflect on each sentence, I can reflect on the message as a whole. And because I have reflected, I feel the messages are more decisive and clear. These options are not available to me in a phone call. For me, reflecting is less stressful than deciding. So sending an email is sometimes preferable. I have more thoughts in this, but you get the idea.