Thursday, December 1, 2011

The 25 Days of Christmas!

the First
day of Christmas
we had plenty of snow,
I would have much rather had
hangings of mistletoe. On the Second 
day of Christmas I drank some eggnog brandy.
A wonderful substitute for peppermint candy. On the
Third day of Christmas I sent out Christmas cards—just me
and a wine bottle sending my best regards. On the Fourth day
of Christmas I decorated my tree, after a few days, it became 
home to a flea.

On the Fifth
day of Christmas I
wrote my wish list, hoping
more than ever, to finally be kissed.
On the Sixth day of Christmas I received
a secret gift, an IOU and a request to work
the night shift. On the Seventh day of Christmas
the grocery store ran out of brie, which I had
planned to eat while playing my Wii. On the
Eighth day of Christmas I got my hair
done, she apologized for making
me look like a nun. On the Ninth
day of Christmas I had a colonoscopy.
The procedure wasn't fun, but the drugs made me
feel free. On the Tenth day of Christmas the carolers did
sing, it wasn’t as good as getting a ring. On the Eleventh day
of Christmas I ate a chocolate chip cookie, then later that night,
my lover wanted some nookie. On the Twelfth day of Christmas I
went to plow. The snow was much higher than the Dow. On the
Thirteenth day of Christmas I went to a holiday festivity, and got
stuck talking to someone about radioactivity. On the Fourteenth
day of Christmas I cooked a Cornish Hen. I couldn't finish
eating it because of too much cayenne. On the Fifteenth  
day of Christmas my ceiling started to leak
The repairman who came, had a
very nice physique.

On the Sixteenth day of Christmas I went sledding with the little ones. By the time we got home, we all had frozen buns. On the Seventeenth day of Christmas my work had a food fest. I ate too much and now I'm unable to digest. On the Eighteenth day of Christmas arose several family dramas. I ignored the calls, and drank in my pajamas. On the Nineteenth day of Christmas my Christmas lights went out. I couldn’t fix them because of my gout. On the Twentieth day of Christmas I watched a holiday flick, about a man, who falls in love with some chick. On the Twenty-First day of Christmas I ate ten candy canes. I’m looking forward to tomorrow, to enjoy some Mary Jane’s. On the Twenty-Second day of Christmas I put the logs on the fire, and thought about the day when I can retire. On the Twenty-Third day of Christmas I thought I heard reindeer, but it was only coming from the computer engineer. On the Twenty-Fourth day of Christmas I made my love dinner. He looked at it and said, “This definitely won’t make you look thinner.” On the Twenty-Ffth day of Christmas we all went to mass, to pray for our shortcomings, and wish for some class.

Mistletoe and Ho! Ho! Ho!


  1. lol! :-) That's too cute, Bea! :-)

  2. Thanks for this one! Very entertaining and fun to read!

  3. I love this. You have a great sense of humor.

  4. Veejay, I'm all about fun. :D

    Belva, Thanks. You gotta have a sense of humor in life.

  5. On the first day after Christmas, I felt quite relaxed/ despite getting a letter about how much I'd be taxed (hold on - I seems to have become McGonagall. Time I had a holiday in Donegal).

  6. Hey Michelle, nice of you to stop by.

    SibatheHat, nice rhyme. :D

  7. This was SO AWESOME! I love love LOVED it!!

  8. Hah, this was really good! At first, I tried to sing it in my head to the tune of "On the first day of Christmas." Bad call. Once I stopped that though, I really enjoyed it. Cheers!

  9. *changes your 'Ho! Ho! Ho!' signature to "Ha! Ha! Ha!"

    This is hilarious! You crack me UP, my friend. It was exactly the laugh I needed today. Very creative. :)