On
the First
day of Christmas
we had plenty of snow,
I would have much rather had
hangings of mistletoe. On the Second
day of Christmas I drank some eggnog brandy.
A wonderful substitute for peppermint candy. On the
Third day of Christmas I sent out Christmas cards—just me
and a wine bottle sending my best regards. On the Fourth day
of Christmas I decorated my tree, after a few days, it became
home to a flea.
On the Fifth
day of Christmas I
wrote my wish list, hoping
more than ever, to finally be kissed.
On the Sixth day of Christmas I received
a secret gift, an IOU and a request to work
the night shift. On the Seventh day of Christmas
the grocery store ran out of brie, which I had
planned to eat while playing my Wii. On the
Eighth day of Christmas I got my hair
done, she apologized for making
me look like a nun. On the Ninth
day of Christmas I had a colonoscopy.
The procedure wasn't fun, but the drugs made me
feel free. On the Tenth day of Christmas the carolers did
sing, it wasn’t as good as getting a ring. On the Eleventh day
of Christmas I ate a chocolate chip cookie, then later that night,
my lover wanted some nookie. On the Twelfth day of Christmas I
went to plow. The snow was much higher than the Dow. On the
Thirteenth day of Christmas I went to a holiday festivity, and got
stuck talking to someone about radioactivity. On the Fourteenth
day of Christmas I cooked a Cornish Hen. I couldn't finish
eating it because of too much cayenne. On the Fifteenth
day of Christmas my ceiling started to leak.
The repairman who came, had a
very nice physique.
On the Sixteenth day of Christmas I went sledding with the little ones. By the time we got home, we all had frozen buns. On the Seventeenth day of Christmas my work had a food fest. I ate too much and now I'm unable to digest. On the Eighteenth day of Christmas arose several family dramas. I ignored the calls, and drank in my pajamas. On the Nineteenth day of Christmas my Christmas lights went out. I couldn’t fix them because of my gout. On the Twentieth day of Christmas I watched a holiday flick, about a man, who falls in love with some chick. On the Twenty-First day of Christmas I ate ten candy canes. I’m looking forward to tomorrow, to enjoy some Mary Jane’s. On the Twenty-Second day of Christmas I put the logs on the fire, and thought about the day when I can retire. On the Twenty-Third day of Christmas I thought I heard reindeer, but it was only coming from the computer engineer. On the Twenty-Fourth day of Christmas I made my love dinner. He looked at it and said, “This definitely won’t make you look thinner.” On the Twenty-Ffth day of Christmas we all went to mass, to pray for our shortcomings, and wish for some class.
Mistletoe and Ho! Ho! Ho!
Bea
Mistletoe and Ho! Ho! Ho!
Bea
lol! :-) That's too cute, Bea! :-)
ReplyDeleteGlad you enjoyed it!
ReplyDeleteThanks for this one! Very entertaining and fun to read!
ReplyDeleteI love this. You have a great sense of humor.
ReplyDeleteVeejay, I'm all about fun. :D
ReplyDeleteBelva, Thanks. You gotta have a sense of humor in life.
Wow! Wonderful post! Too cool :)
ReplyDeleteOn the first day after Christmas, I felt quite relaxed/ despite getting a letter about how much I'd be taxed (hold on - I seems to have become McGonagall. Time I had a holiday in Donegal).
ReplyDeleteHey Michelle, nice of you to stop by.
ReplyDeleteSibatheHat, nice rhyme. :D
This was SO AWESOME! I love love LOVED it!!
ReplyDeleteHah, this was really good! At first, I tried to sing it in my head to the tune of "On the first day of Christmas." Bad call. Once I stopped that though, I really enjoyed it. Cheers!
ReplyDelete*changes your 'Ho! Ho! Ho!' signature to "Ha! Ha! Ha!"
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious! You crack me UP, my friend. It was exactly the laugh I needed today. Very creative. :)